Although the ashes of this literally still linger in the air, now that a few small motes of dust have settled on the immediate information released about the mass murders of Hannah and her Children, I find that – there is so much I want to say right now but can’t. So much more expression wish I could express but can’t. So much more I wish I could do but can’t. So much more I wish I could feel but can’t. I can’t because I’m so grief stricken that I just don’t have words. I can’t because there are actually no real words to express the reality of this. I can’t because I, and the women that I work with are already doing everything we can. I can’t because no matter how much love, care and heart wrenching empathy I have…I still cannot even imagine what Hannah, Aaliyah, Laianah, and Trey felt…what terror and agony they experienced at that moment when an abusive perpetrator and murderer doused them in liquid fuel and set them on fire to burn alive.

My feelings to be honest are quite insignificant and irrelevant to the story. But we all have feelings and I know from your responses to these domestic violence murders that you care a LOT about this. Take these outspoken feelings of rage and grief and anger and frustration and angst and shame at a society that still sees this happen without a national outcry resulting in real change and….KEEP IT ALIVE.

Keep it alive for the women and children who no longer have their lives to live. Keep it alive for all of the women and children still living in fear that they will be the next headline. Keep it alive for all the young girls about to embark on their first loving relationships who may experience abuse. Keep it alive for all the entitled men (young and old) who think that their partner is their property. Because the longer we keep this inferno of rage alive….the more chance we have of keeping women and children experiencing domestic violence alive.
So keep it alive my friends. Take the atrocious, murderous blaze that was the final culminative act of a cowardly, violent, abusive man….and let it fuel you to keep your rage and activism against men’s violence alive.

We can only make change together, and I’m relying on you because I know you and you’re good people, the best. But it’s time to ramp it up and use your voices and connections to make your feelings and opinions plain and clear constantly. Not just when a bad thing happens but EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  Share the article about sexism, men’s violence against women, gender equality, abusive men, and men’s violence. Even though you’re worried about offending Uncle Bob, Aunty Beryl, your dad, your brother, a male friend who’s a ‘good guy’ but gets upset when you discuss these things – JUST DO IT ANYWAY.

These small acts make cultural change. DO comment on the shitty victim blaming comments or posts that you see. Not because it will change the posters mind, but because a domestic and family violence will see you do it and will know that they’re not alone, that not everyone blames them. Let them know that they’re entitled to expect better and that the community cares about them.

This is much longer than I had planned it to be, for someone who I thought had little to say. But I still feel like it is too little, and it is certainly too late for Hannah and her babies.
Rest in power Hannah because I know for a fact that you did everything in your power to keep yourself and your babies safe. He just had more privilege driven hate in his heart to drive him to commit the ultimate act of control, and no-one could have done anything to stop that.

I’m so sorry, so, so sorry!